The Delicate Art of Balance

The Wilkes Family – Apple Picking
September 22, 2012

The art of balance in ones life is something that I think we all struggle with on a daily basis. I am a firm believer that we cannot be all things to all people at all times. I cannot tell you how many times, I am hit with the phrase “how do you do it all?”, whether it’s via email, on The Cottage Mama Facebook page, or in real life with my friends and family.

I am always a taken back by this question, because the true answer is simple, “I don’t.” I wish I knew how to get it all done. But for that to happen, I would need two of me and a lot more hours in the day. I think you make time in your life for the things that are important to you. And somedays certain things are more important than others.

When I think of balance my husband comes to mind. As I have mentioned here before, he is an avid home-brewer and makes award winning beers. Brewing is something he is truly passionate about and he makes time for it in his life. He leaves for work at 7:30 AM and is not home before 7:30 PM every single day. That makes for some longs days. So he does not get a whole lot of time to spend with the kids during the week. But on the weekends he is 100% devoted to having ‘Daddy Fun Days’ with them. If he wants to brew beer, he does it after they have gone to bed. He gives up sleep in order to achieve the balance in his life. I’m not advocating not sleeping to achieve balance, but it’s what works for him. He wants to make room for brewing in his life and that’s how he makes it work. My point being, is that you figure out a way to make time for the things in life that are important to you and sometimes you have to give up one thing for another.

But the truth is that balance is achieved through an ebb and flow in life. You cannot neglect one aspect of life completely and expect there not to be a negative reaction. Balance is a struggle. I don’t know if it is for you, but it is something I am constantly thinking about and trying to keep myself in check. I have a true sense of guilt when I am not doing what I feel I should be doing in certain aspects of my life. But sometimes it is important to release yourself from that feeling of guilt in order to maintain balance in ones life. If one of my kids is having a hard day, then maybe I don’t get to the dishes. If I’m trying to finish a project, then maybe we have frozen pizza for dinner. But you know what? That’s ok.

For instance, right now I wish I was posting tons of different projects and tutorials for you all. I have all these great seasonal ideas in my head that I don’t have time to share. Do I feel a little sense of guilt that I’m not making that happen? Well…….yes. But the reality is that I am working on my book and cannot share many of my projects right now. While I try to balance writing with paying attention to my family and my home life, it’s what has to give during this time in my life. And I know you understand that and I am now officially releasing myself from that guilt. Ahhh, I feel much better!

I read Sarah Jane’s post today and it just got me thinking, so I guess that’s why I’m writing this post today. To be totally honest, I think I do a pretty good job balancing all the different things going on in our life right now and it is constantly a work in progress. But there is one thing I would like you to know about me………I do not do it all. And that’s fine by me.

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  1. What a lovely post! Thanks for sharing, looking forward to seeing your book, carry on, we can wait a bit here. :o)

  2. Ah, the age old dilemma, glad you are finding your own balance, a fine art if ever there was one! Happy writing 🙂

  3. I hear you! I’m with both you and your husband. Balance is a struggle, and I often feel like I’m doing an okay job at everything I do, but not a really GOOD job at any of it. And that’s when the ebb and flow comes into play. And when push comes to shove, I just give up sleep and get it done!

  4. so well written – thank you

  5. Amen Lindsay! So well put! I have been thinking for weeks I need to write a post like this. No one does it ALL! Thanks for this post – you blessed me today!

  6. I think it’s this season that makes us catch our breath and make sure we are in the right place….something about the changing of the seasons, right? LOVED your honesty and openness. It’s a tricky balance, because we have so many things that are important in our lives, and so many things that we can do to protect those important things. Knowing what do choose and not to choose is a delicate balance…but you said it so well! Thanks Lindsay!!
    sarah jane

  7. I think you’re pretty amazing!

  8. A perfect post, written so very very well. Here I am reading blogs at 1am because all the fabulous bloggers who have helped me in my quest to sew better deserve some of my time. Your book will be perfect and I’m looking forward to holding my copy. I’ve been quite unwell this year and have lost friends because they didn’t have time for me when I could not give back. I accepted that they had other more important things to do. It’s sad but true. I’ve come to realise while I can’t protect myself from it happening again, I have learned to be careful who/what I give my time to. Thank you..I’m going to re-read this post often.

  9. Grandma Jane says

    Love you sweet daughter! I think you are pretty amazing, too! Hugs from your mama!

  10. Thanks for your post. One cannot ‘have it all’ or ‘do it all’. We are only one person and were not made to be all to everyone or do all for everyone. Life on earth is fleeting and my belief system tells me to do that which counts for eternity with what I’ve been given. I’ve failed many times with this and don’t always know what that means, but we’ve been given grace for this journey of life. Thankyou, God, for life, grace, and opportunities! Thanks, Lindsay, for this post in your blog!

  11. This is so inspiring! So nice to know that the “famous bloggers” think about balance too! You are such a great Mama and so very talented too!!!